Methane Gas

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It has been reported that a lot of the problem with the earth's ozone layer is the result of excessive bovine flatulence.

The world peoples, other than the Hindus, eat a tremendous amount of beef. Is it expedient then for mankind to find an alternative food source? Certainly, all warmblooded creatures basically have the same digestive systems, including us. What meat, or other rich protein source should we then put on our backyard grill?

According to the "Save The Earth" people, the answer is none. No more hotdogs at the ballpark. No more burgers on the grill. All dogs and cats need to become vegetarians as well. Carrots and celery sticks would be the feature items at all the fast food chains.

We would be a healthier people, and the ozone would help slow down the melting of your ice cubes in your tea. Isn't that wonderful? No more UV protection needed in you sunscreen.

This year, I once again did my part on Earth Day. I fixed me a large bowl of pinto beans, decorated with an organically grown chopped onion, I sacrificed the usual country ham in my beans in honor of this holiest of environmentalist's day. I started to savor this treat a little after eight in the evening. I watched a program that showed the mistreatment of chickens. (Poor things they really don't have any rights.) All the while washing down my beans and onions with organically squeezed soy milk.

I started this annual ritual late in the evening, because I'm well aware of my body's reaction to legumes. I didn't want to pollute the sacred day by having contributed to the destruction of the ozone before midnight.


Now, methane gas is flammable. Naturally, a natural source of energy. I can very well see a future of sticking a pressurized bottle of methane into ones vehicle and drive off to work. I can also see each homeowner, with their own septic system, utilizing this natural emission to heat their hot water tank. Why not? It is free. Or we could stick a pipe down to the septic tank and light the gas coming off and have an eternal flame to soothe the ozone gods.

I have heard stories of pining engineers at most universities have personally experimented with the combustibility and potential use of methane. I've heard stories of these tests being performed not in the lab, but by sitting around in their skivvies, playing with matches.

Funny or not, we do need to consider our environment. It is our job to protect and preserve what has been entrusted to us.

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